★ 論“在學(xué)校闖禍”

“你為什么要拿球砸別人的臉？……這樣哦，那他活該被砸。嗯，老師不爽是他的事，我不會(huì)怪你?！?/p>

☆On Getting in Trouble at School

“Why would you throw a ball in someone’s face? ... Huh. That’s a pretty good reason. Well, I can’t do much about your teacher being pissed, but me and you are good.”

★ 論“圣誕節(jié)禮物清單”

“你竟然挑了二十五件禮物，還按期望程度排序？耍什么寶？我是問(wèn)你想要什么圣誕禮物，誰(shuí)叫你弄個(gè)人氣排行榜這種鬼東西給我。”

☆On Making a Christmas List

“You ranked the twenty-five presents you want, in order of how much you want them? Are you insane? I said tell me what you want for Christmas, not make a fucking college football poll.”

★ 論“滑水道”

“要玩你自己去玩，我才不想滑進(jìn)一池臭小孩的尿液中?！?/p>

☆On Waterslides

“You go on ahead. I’d rather not be shot out of a tube into a pool filled with a bunch of nine-year-olds’ urine.”

★ 論“自己準(zhǔn)備午餐”

“一定帶個(gè)三明治去學(xué)校，不準(zhǔn)只裝餅干和垃圾食物……不對(duì)，我的意思是，如果你想自己準(zhǔn)備午餐，可以帶自己喜歡的點(diǎn)心，但不代表你可以亂帶一通。”

☆On Packing My Own Lunch

“You have to pack a sandwich. It can’t just be cookies and bullshit.... No, I said if you packed it yourself, you could pack it how you want it, not pack it like a moron.”

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[1]?《大獎(jiǎng)?chuàng)Q不換》（Let’s Make a Deal）：源于美國(guó)的電視游戲節(jié)目，參賽者要在三扇關(guān)閉的門中選擇一扇，其中一扇門后有大獎(jiǎng)（如汽車），另外兩扇門則是“安慰”獎(jiǎng)（如羊或豬）。參賽者決定好之后，主持人會(huì)在剩下兩扇門中打開(kāi)沒(méi)有大獎(jiǎng)的一扇門，再問(wèn)參賽者要不要換門。