我的兒子有一只黑白相間的寵物兔子，它總是會給我們種種驚喜。它被訓(xùn)練得很乖，從不在房間里隨地大小便。它愛玩一個小玩具，有時會在它自己籃子里的手柄上來回轉(zhuǎn)悠。

它喜歡看早間新聞，跟我們其他人一起坐在沙發(fā)上。偶爾用它的后爪碰碰遙控器，或是趁我不注意時在我的杯子里吸幾口茶。

這只小兔子簡直就是我們生活的一部分，我們無法想象沒有它的日子會怎樣。

兩年后，它沒能逃過“流感”，這是一種很少有兔子能躲過的災(zāi)疫。我當時給獸醫(yī)打電話，醫(yī)生也答應(yīng)來了，趕來回60英里的路來救我們的小寵物。

在等待的時候，我把它放在我的大腿上，想給它喂點水。它虛弱而平靜地躺在我的身上，姿勢看起來并不像往常那么自然。它把頭舒適地倚在我的胳膊上，看了我一眼。那根本就不像是一只小兔子的眼神。

后來，我意識到那是一種感謝，感謝我當時陪著它，感謝我對它的關(guān)心和愛。在那一刻，我突然有一種少有的感覺，那是最純潔、毫無雜質(zhì)的愛的形式：剝離了私欲的、僅僅作為一種神秘力量存在的愛。

我感覺到這種愛從我的體內(nèi)散發(fā)出去，像一把保護傘一樣輕輕地把它包裹了起來，當它喘息著最后一口氣的時候溫柔地將它扶在我的手臂里。

我永遠也不會忘記那只小兔子和那種感覺，那是它以及任何生命可以給予的、對生命的啟示。

During a brief acting career, I appeared in an obscure play at a backstreet theatre. My part was a real challenge, furiously rehearsed for weeks.

On the second night after opening, I was aware of a strange lack of response from the house. Believing there was something lacking in my performance I tried a little harder ? and harder still. No improvement.

Only in the interval was the terrible truth revealed: There was no one in the audience. I was mortified. To this day I feel the blush on my cheek when I think of myself pouring my heart out ? to no one.

I quit acting soon after that. It obviously wasn’t the right choice for me, if a response was so essential.

By contrast think of an artist like Renoir, who went on producing pictures, day in day out, year after year, decade following decade. Nothing ever stopped him, no amount of discouragement, poverty or failure. He painted away, regardless of people’s opinions, in pure delight at his own creativity.

To be an artist merely for the return it may bring is as doomed as entering a relationship only for what you hope to get out of it: warmth, togetherness, intimacy, sex, security, money, status or whatever: The minute the reward is not forthcoming, it all comes to an end.

Love is like art: to survive it has to be genuine, sustained by its own imperative, and never requiring an applause.

A lot of people have a fear of commitment. I suppose what they really abhor is becoming dependent, handing over control. I can relate to that.

What I can’t understand is why anyone should want to control another, especially in the name of love. For if you attempt it, it leaves the other person with no option but to resist, evade or deceive you, or, worst of all, succumb to your will, in which case their personality expires, and you are stuck with what  A mollusc.

The symbiosis of domination, like any mutual dependence, is the enemy of love. Based on want, our greatest weakness, it makes us stunted, insecure. For if you rely on each other to fill the vacuum inside you, one of you is always bound to lose, as the other one dies, or simply moves on.

So ? if you wish to find a partner, foster your independence, over-come your needs. Thus released, you’ll have the best to offer: your own affluent heart.

Give freely of your love. One day you’ll come across another giver, and then it will all fall into place, without any restrictions. You’ll both be ready for the ultimate gift: that of commitment.